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Staff writer

Some things appear black and white, but they are not always.

Growing up, Philip Okongo-Gwoke was told there were six races.

“It was a lie,” he said to the 75-80 people who came to see Black and White Oct. 29.

The truth is there is only one race – human, said  Okongo-Gwoke, who introduces himself as the black guy of Black and White Productions.

Okongo-Gwoke and Garth Heckman, the white guy, presented a message of developing mutual respect and values to residents from the St. Francis Independent School District 15 communities.

Okongo-Gwoke said his way of thinking was changed by a chance conversation he had in college.

He was getting to know a man named Cedric and Okongo-Gwoke told Cedric, “I am biracial.”

Cedric’s response was “No, you’re not.”

At first Okongo-Gwoke was stunned.

How could this guy say that. Okongo-Gwoke’s father was a black man from Uganda, Africa, and his mother a white woman from Bloomer, Wis., he said.

He had been led to believe he was of two races, but really he was from only one – human, Okongo-Gwoke said.

Cedric got him to question the definition of race, which is usually defined by skin color, hair type and the shape of the facial features., he said.

By that definition, there are six million races, Okongo-Gwoke said.

After not fitting in his entire life and struggling to figure out who he was, Okongo-Gwoke said he knew – human.

“I’m in the same box has you – human,” he said.

When he was growing up, Okongo-Gwoke said he was led to believe he was in a certain group of people, defined by what he looked like that could not be changed and that life was a roll of the dice.

“It’s not. It’s a Rubik’s Cube,” he said.

There are more than more than 43 quintillion combinations, about seven million combinations per person on Earth, Okongo-Gwoke said.

“Rubik’s Cube is skill and choice, not the chance of the dice,” he said.

“I can choose the outcome of my life. I get to decide, not the color of my skin.”

“St. Francis has the same choice.”’

Judging others

Judging people by the way they look can lead to missed opportunities, Heckman said.

As a young child, his father would take him to the racquetball court.

One day when his father’s partner did not show up, this really big woman offered to play. But his father kept staying no because he wanted someone who could challenge him, Heckman said.

With only a half-hour left of court time, the father took the woman up on her offer.

Heckman said he remembers thinking, “Dad, be nice.”

From the gallery, Heckman watched as the woman “tore my dad to pieces” on the court.

Turns out the woman was the women’s national champion and ended the session instructing his father on his game, Heckman.

“What would you learn from the person next to you or behind you,” he said.

“We all judge people by how they look.”

“We rob the value of people by not getting to know them. We need to learn to see the value on the inside and allow people to have the value of who they are.”

Being yourself

Other differences are harder to spot.

Growing up on a dairy farm Scott Zimmer knew he was different at an early age.

“I grew up in a town were there was more cows than people,” he said.

Zimmer said he always wondered if his father knew there was a little gay boy sweeping the barn floor.

“I knew at a really young age,” he said. “I was intuitive enough to know it was not something I should talk about. It wasn’t normal.”  

Being gay was something he kept to himself for many years. Through junior high. Through high school. Into college, Zimmer said.

No one wants a gay brother. A gay best friend. A gay son, he said.

But it was like walking around with only one shoe. While he can function, it feels weird because something is missing, Zimmer said.

“I am a lot of things,” he said. “Being gay is just one piece of the puzzle and for too long I let it define me.”

“You need to embrace who you are. Don’t be ashamed of you are.”

Values

When asked what values the group wanted the community to have, the audience came up with:

• Have more respect, be more welcoming.

• Be a place where everyone can be exactly who they are.

• Be able to have a good life and have fun.

• Be a community people feel safe in.

• Have an open-mind to others, their cultures and who they are.

This community needs to continue to work on its values, Okongo-Gwoke said.

There is no room for compromise, he said.

Okongo-Gwoke told a the story of one father’s stand on values.

This family’s values included not watching R rated movies.

When his sons begged him to compromise his values and let them watch a movie with only a little bit of R material in it, the man said to give him time to think about it.

The next day the sons came home to their father waiting with fresh baked chocolate chip cookies, Okongo-Gwoke said.

The father told his sons that he had made those cookies from the finest ingredients, he said.

But he sprinkled in just a little dog poop, Okongo-Gwoke said.

Those kids would not touch the cookies. “It goes to show there is no room for poop in our cookies,” he said.

If a community lets in even a little lie, it could destroy it, Okongo-Gwoke said.

DOT

Black and White was sponsored by the Diversity Outreach Team (DOT),  a group of about 20 concerned citizens.

The group started one year ago and grew out of a discussion group in answer to increasing harassment in the community, said Dusty Johnson, DOT chairman.

The DOT is comprised of business owners, community members, concerned parents, District 15 staff members in St. Francis and surrounding areas.

“Our mission...is to acknowledge and value our differences and promote  ongoing opportunities for awareness and acceptance and inclusion in our community,” Johnson said.

“Our group wants to be actions, not just words.”

In its first year, DOT has  work with the University of Minnesota Extension program to have community dialogues, created signs for schools and businesses and made group visible at community events.

“Discrimination and harassment of individuals based on race, national origin, religion, gender and/or sexual orientation hurts the victims and the community as a whole,” Johnson said.

“Even well-intentioned words and actions can offend and hurt if they come from a place of misunderstanding and ignorance.”

The goal is to make St. Francis and the surrounding communities a place where everyone feels safe and respected, Johnson said.

The community is welcomed at DOT meetings, which take place the first and third Thursdays of the month at St. Francis High School from 5 to 6:30 p.m.

Tammy Sakry is at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it